now I lay you down to sleep

Yesterday was weird. We met with my son's kindergarten teacher. A kind of pre-test, see how much everyone, including the parents, knows. Maybe it's her way of getting a preview for the coming year. For me it was . . . well let's just say hard. My baby is growing up and leaving me three and a half hours a day. You're saying, "So what? Make yourself some popcorn, put in 'Return of the King' and he'll be home by the time the credits roll." You're right.

Last night I was laying with my son while he fell asleep. He said, "Mommy, I want you to sleep with me until I'm seventeen, no until I'm twenty. No Mommy, I want you to sleep with me forever until you die." My heart burst. He loves me and needs me so much. And of course the love by far overshadowed the visual I had of a hundred year old woman in bed with her seventy year old son. I told you yesterday was weird.

I think what bothers me most about school is that I am unable to protect my son from the realities of the world. Judgment, anger, fear, just to name a few. I guess the only thing I can do, for both of us, is to be there when the five year old needs his Mommy, and if need be . . . the seventy year old.

Drop me a virtual line at